Back to the Dark Times…I moved back home and began a grad school program. I went back to my regular stylist. Scheduling conflicts prevented me from staying with her very long. I found another stylist, who was recommended by a friend, that I was satisfied with. I wanted something different so I got her to give me a shoulder dusting bob and bangs. Things were stable, but around this time the stress started. School, worrying about my future, a career, bad boyfriends…my hair was stable, I was not.
I moved to another city and things got icky. The stress continued, I noticed my hair seeming to thin. I was still going to a salon every two weeks, but a new problem cropped up. I started to have a dandruff issue. My scalp itched all the time, even a day or two after I went to the stylist. I did not find and did not know where to look for helpful information about this at the time, but I tried what I could.
A friend and I began talking about hair. I don’t know how we started talking about it, but I must say I never expected talking hair to be the gateway to me getting to know this wonderful girl that I am now glad to call my sister. She told me about all this information she was finding online and how she had developed a hair regimen. I thought, “Hair blog, what? Regimen, huh?”
I dove in starting with cutting out heat. All the while I was reading and absorbing information from tons of resources online. I wore a braid out for about the first three months of my HHJ. I started steaming my hair, deep conditioning, and trying new products. I tried tons of different things.
She came down one weekend and on a whim I let her do my relaxer. I was surprised by the growth. It was noticeable. That was all I needed to continue full steam ahead. I continued with using little heat and kept trying new things. Progress was happening and I was excited. She relaxed my hair one more time and she said I should really think about doing it myself. I was scared to do that. It was something I had never done, never had a desire to do, but here I was with progress on my own and I was not willing to let whatever stylist could fit me in give me a setback. I asked a friend to come over and watch me while I did it. I set my timer and if I could not finish or needed help she was there. Luckily, that relaxer went off without a hitch. I could do this and I would continue to do this.
So, that brings us to now. I continue to work on my regimen. My hair has continued to grow and retain length. My trouble areas continue to improve and I monitor my progress and set goals for myself.
The moral of this long story is that I spent most of my life trusting, implicitly, anyone with a cosmetologist’s license. Some were okay, some were good, one was phenomenal. I also did not do the work necessary to find people, techniques, and solutions that could help me move forward. For me, it was only when I took matters into my own hands that I was able to find sustainable progress with my hair and not be dependent on a stylist’s skill. It made me feel good that I was gaining the knowledge that would allow me to control and guide my hair toward what I wanted it to look like and not feel like going to a stylist was the only way. There is no magic to it. There is only understanding yourself and knowing what works for you.