This week, I was researching and watching several YouTube videos on different wig methods. One video that purported to be on topic was particularly interesting but not for the reason you’d expect.
The girl in the video started out by saying how she already told folks she’d keep some hair “secrets” to herself. But she decided to release one secret after several women emailed her begging for help.
I stopped watching the video after a couple of minutes, mostly because she rambled off topic for longer than I could withstand. But her statement really shocked me – she admitted to withholding potentially helpful “secrets” from her viewers.
My mind started racing with several questions:
Why do that?
Is this why people still ask me for my secret to long hair?
Do people think that a select few individuals have the secret to healthy long hair and they just aren’t sharing the wealth?
If Steve jobs saved his secret gadgets for himself do you think Apple would be what it is today? (My mind gets random sometimes).
This YouTubers’ mentality is coming from a “scarcity mindset,” which is essentially believing there’s limited resources in the world so you must hoard what you can for yourself because if others find out about what you have, they’ll take it away from you. People often have a scarcity mindset about money (which always baffles me considering that our money is no longer backed by gold but I digress).
But to have a scarcity mindset about hair tips? Really? Why even start a YouTube channel just to dangle the prospect of a secret that you admitted you won’t share?
We each grow our own hair, so it’s not exactly a limited resource. I can even understand the folks who are secretive about their beloved extensions distributor. I don’t agree with it but I get it. How does withholding information that could help others benefit you? Their shine doesn’t affect you. It takes nothing away from a candle to light another candle.
I’m not trying to bash this girl and I won’t disclose her channel for that very reason. I had to do an internal check and ask myself whether I have a scarcity mentality about any area of my life that’s causing me to unconsciously withhold information that could help others.
Then it occurred to me that this is why some women, including some I know personally, still ask me what’s my secret to growing long hair. Never mind the fact that I’ve written a hair care book and my hair journey is probably better documented than the rise and fall of the Ottoman Empire. They still suspect that I’m hiding the secret because they might be keeping information that they know might benefit others. We see what’s behind our own eyes. So if we would do something, we project that thinking onto others and expect them to do the same.
Now I must say this type of “marketing” is actually brilliant. Devious, but brilliant. She tapped into women’s fear and belief that there’s a hair secret thereby increasing her viewership by dangling the hope of revealing secrets.
Here’s the danger of having a scarcity mindset when it comes to your hair – it will inevitably become a self-fulfilling prophecy. If you think you need a certain hair type, or secret product/technique, etc to grow your hair then you’ll unconsciously create an environment that confirms your belief. Thus leaving you feeling dejected about your hair and blaming some external factors. But your hair is entirely up to you. Absent a medical condition, you can achieve healthy, long hair (both natural and relaxed).
So, what’s the secret to growing longer hair? It’s believing that you can.