When it comes to life goals, it’s very helpful to have someone you admire that motivates you towards your own goals. This person could be a family member, a mentor, or a public figure that you’ve never met. Regardless of who the person is, you aspire to achieve similar success in your life.
Unfortunately, there’s a darker side to looking at what others have done with their life. It’s called comparison. Comparing yourself to others is a slippery slope. Whether you’re comparing “up” (by thinking they have more than you), or comparing “down” (by thinking you have more than others), it’s an unhealthy mental exercise.
Why? Because “comparison is the thief of joy.” This principle applies to all aspects of life – career, financial success, fitness, etc.
When I first started my hair journey, I had a few “hair idols” that I followed because we had similar hair types and they had achieved my hair goal. So I looked up to these women (side note – thanks to Facebook I’ve become online friends with a few of them and “real” friends with a couple). Things were great when I just looked to them for inspiration but there were times when I’d feel sad, disappointed and even jealous that they already achieved my goal. This is “normal” and to be expected when you start comparing yourself to others. The question becomes “why them, and not me yet?”
But here’s the thing, you have your own journey to take in life and you don’t always know what someone has been through to get to where they are now. Whenever I would feel negative emotions about my current hair status, I’d look at the beginning pictures my hair idols posted. Seeing the progress they made reenergized me and reminded me that they also had their struggles.
The lesson here? “Don’t compare your chapter 1, someone else’s chapter 20” (~ Unknown). Instead, give yourself a chance to learn and grow at your own pace. Most importantly,
remember that regardless of your starting point, you can reach your goals.
I’m not saying this is easy or that I’ve mastered the mental discipline required to stop comparing. I’ve learned to stop comparing my hair status to other women but I now struggle with comparing myself to other hair bloggers and YouTubers sometimes. I just remind myself again that this is my journey and that with continued effort, I’ll achieve my goals.
What keeps you motivated with your hair goals and other life goals?